I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize