I would go down on you faster than GM stock
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
