Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
