I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize
