If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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