She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Randomize
