I want to make a zoo with you.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Two words: blizzard sex
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
