addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
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