Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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