I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
