I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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