If i come over, it means nothing
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
