the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
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i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
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Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
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