i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
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Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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