OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Randomize
