Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
