All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Randomize