Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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