Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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