And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
