what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Come share oat with me in your robe
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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