No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.