Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
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i would one night stand the shit outta him
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
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I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
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