I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
We have so much sex to catch up on
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
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