He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
