Is it normal to miss your booty call?
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
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