I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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