But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Hippo gnu deer
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
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