this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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