why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize