He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
as a side note pls kill me
Then you guys just all showered together...?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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