Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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