I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Randomize