so explain again why im purple
no
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Randomize
