We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize