with your own penis?
Only a mothe r could love this liver
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
She's like a pop up book from hell.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
