people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
You are a genius and a whore.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
