he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
