remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
