I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
