dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
