he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
