im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
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