You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
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