I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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