Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Your cock deserves a montage
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
