saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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