By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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