We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
