I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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