oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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