did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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